It’s natural to spend a lot of time focusing on how awful we are at everything and on how little we have done and how everyone else has it all together, we’re not good enough, my nose is to big..blah blah blah…do I need to continue?
I was having this conversation the other day when I decided that EVEN THOUGH I am not at my “end goal” and I am still oceans under the ground I want to be on, I must remember where I started and love my journey for what its been. Being forever grateful that I have been able to turn my life in a 180 within just a couple of years.
We must love our mistakes and and our failures for the lessons they have provided. (If you’re sitting here with no failures than I suggest you start living.)
I decided that instead of listing off all of the things that I don’t have and haven’t YET done, it would be way more productive to list off the things that I have done, the things that helped me grow. No matter where you are in your journey all you need to do it start, pick up some snow and roll your snowball. Start appreciating your shadowed awesome-ness. Behind all of these things I did, I had so much doubt and anxiety. But by saying yes and going for it, amazing things have happened.
Chances are you’re way cooler than you are giving yourself credit for and I would love to see what YOUR “Lists Of Cans” are.
The List of things I actually can do ( A list of things I’ve done)
I ACTUALLY can…
-Graduate College on the Dean’s List, as an honor student every year (growing up with learning disabilities)
-Win an award for top 10 Best Graphic Design Posters in college
– Get a B+ in a math class in college that I convinced myself I was going to fail and had cried myself sick almost every day. (This was actually a GREAT life lesson, slap in the face, and wake-up call; expand later?
-Prepare myself for the gym by starting my journey in my bed room with nothing more than a yoga mat and some 5lb weights and eventually be confident to work out completely alone in a gym. (Poor self- image, eating disorders, heavy recreational…..user)
-I can lose the weight (Wakes up at 5am and go’s for 3 mile runs before work)
-Gain the weight back (To look human again and to put on more muscle)
-Be strong enough to one day bench press more than the bar (current pr 150 for 1)
-Be strong enough to one day squat more than the bar (pr 185 for 9)
-Decide to just go for it and steps on stage in a bikini with no trainer, no posing or dieting experience, just a girl with a dream (brings home 4th place at first bikini show
-Win my WNBF Bikni Pro Card
-Lose and gain the weight again (puts on more muscle)
-Take home 3rd place at my first WNBF Pro show
-Gain and lose the weight again to compete for the NPC
-Win 1st place in Open and Novice and then win the Overall at the NPC Jay Cutlter Nov. 2015 in classes of 30+ competitors (natural)
-Feel confident enough to model and not cry after seeing the photos (Gets hired and paid for modeling gigs, gets published)
-Work as an extra in a movie
-Feel confident enough to continue to get back on stage after making last, fourth, and third call outs (still leaves Miami with a Metal)
-Travel alone, (figures out how to re-book canceled flights before getting stranded: realizes I’m actually not an idiot.)
-Work the Olympia with my favorite supplement company (huge dream since 2012, discovers pride)
-Figure out how to live in another country (Surviving Germany)
-Get my recipe published ( re-discovers love for writing and creating)
-Learn to read music.
-Learn to find value in myself and that I am not my “struggles” my struggles are things that happened not things that are. (Learns self-acceptance)
-Stop caring so much about others opinions about what I am doing. (If you’re not helping improve me, feed me, teach me, if you’re not helping me grow, your opinion is null)
-Go from “street rat” to survivor, life liver, goal chaser, and dream catcher.
-Get it done and just totally go for it.
– Learn to say No.
What can YOU DO?…..